rites of passage

"Permanently migrating to Australia" was the option provided by the disembarkation card for my case. i ticked it, of course. then mulled over what "permanent" means. permanence never occurred to me. not on anything. a long time is not permanent. maybe because i change a lot. maybe because i don't grow roots. permanence is applicable to God, but not to me. all the same, i ticked that option. went through several motions. i am here. away from the rainy philippines to the wintery sydney.

separations, i believe, call for proper mourning. i practice that too. except for this case. when i skipped so many mourning sessions so i could finish all the preparations needed and meet up with as many friends as i could. then there's mama not approving of me crying especially when traveling.

i am thankful for the ride to the airport i shared with ivy. it is only with her that i went through my motions of separation. we cried, acknowledging we'd miss each other. but it's okay. and it's okay to cry. we'd see each other soon. we bid each other take care. fared each other well. i also remember distinctly ta, ma and les. separation, albeit temporarily, paved way for a loving and warm farewell.

as i look out the window, i see brick houses. apartments are now called flats. elevators, lifts. it is currently 2:40pm and everbody is most probably eating lunch in manila. i am in an altogether new place. but my thoughts often drift back to the philippines. i will live here and will likely change a lot. [i hope my accent does not, though.] living calls for growth, not permanence.

food trip

being the picky eater i've become, i thought of listing down my comfort food that i will surely miss(aside from home-cooked meals, malakanin na buko, manggang hilaw, and binatog):

01. el pollo loco - white chicken meat, tortilla and salsa.
02. meylin hand-pulled noodles - kimchi noodles, hot and sour noodles and oyster misua.
03. nypd pizza - lasagna verde (i don't think they still have this on the menu though).
04. JT's manukan - petcho chicken inasal.
05. amici di don bosco - Spaghetti Red Vongole e Gamberattii and Cannelloni Agli Spinaci.
06. mr. kabab - chicken kabab sandwich, roasted tomatoes and yogurt drink.
07. tasty dumplings - kiamchay noodles.
08. aling tonya's, seaside - grilled shrimp and crabs in special sauce.
09. golden fortune, soler - shabu shabu at 20% off.
10. wai ying - shrimp chongfan.
11. shoppersville bakeshop - pancit palabok.
12. enriquez smoothies, shopping center - avocado smoothie and papaya-pinapple smoothie.
13. wendy's - biggie iced tea.
14. jollibee - chickenjoy.
15. polland hopia - fresh lumpia.
16. FIC - vanilla ice cream.
17. chocolat - death by tablea chocolate cake.
18. coffee bean and tea leaf - strawberry and cream tea and genmaicha.
19. chocolate kiss - devil's food cake.
20. via mare - bibingka.
21. coop, up campus - kare-kare.
22. ersao - bubble green tea.
23. cafe monaco - bibimbop and beef pocket.
24. chowking - mantao.
25. gatas ng kalabaw - pure milk.
26. dencia's, davao - lugaw and tokwa't baboy.
27. dusk til dawn, davao - petcho chicken barbecue.
28. cecil's, davao - palabok and batchoy.
29. nanay porie's, kidapawan - petcho chicken barbecue.
30. jaltan, davao - malagkit na kakanin.
31. razon's - halo-halo.

simplify

i have learned that simplification entails so much complications. however, i want to believe it is all worth it. these past days of thinking through what to bring to sydney, with less than a month left, i have been racking my brain (and my heart) on what's important and what's not.

alas, importance is a very difficult word. "what is important to me?" is even more difficult to answer. so i strip myself naked knowing that my life too shall pass and i will eventually separate from everything, everyone. then it dawned on me: LOVE.

John 15:13, says "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." and 1 Corinthians 13 says how this is done. just when i am close to convincing myself i am a loving person, i am proven wrong. but i am no time-traveller, so i can only move forward in time. i am embarking (yet again) on a quest for love.

1. loving means standing by promises made, words uttered. in a generation where self-gratification is of utmost importance, honor is much wanted and most refreshing.
2. generosity is love made visible.
a. ivy came up with this: "if you have anything you haven't used in the last 6 months, give it a new home." it is unfair for the item you have been keeping not to fulfill it's full potential. and you'd definitely make another person smile.
b. "as your income increases, maintain your lifestyle. this will give you more opportunity to give.", kuya ken counseled.
c. i try to seek ways to cut down costs - turn off appliances not in use [helps save the environment for the future generation]; refrain from forwarding unnecessary text messages [saves intended recipients' time] - and use the money instead to sponsor a child's education.
3. loving is having foresight.
a. plant a tree instead of cutting it down. what is the use of saving so much money for your children when they will run out of fresh air to breathe? i personally realized that i should cut down on book buying (paper = trees), i will instead go to the library or trade books.
b. the same goes for clothes (and shoes and bags!). imagine the resources, fuel, raw materials being used to make fabrics. buy from recycle shops and sell or give out those i no longer have plans of using [less fire hazard at home].

i have realized i am bombarded with advertisements so i will be compelled to think i need more than i actually do: if it is now neccessary to stay connected (i.e. mobile phones), i don't think it is necessary to own a 30k unit with all the features not really usable as i have other gadgets (ipod for music, laptop for web, dslr for taking photographs, etc etc.) for the same functions. cut down on redundancy. i pray i won't fall victim of commercialism-consumerism-materialism.

so what is left to bring? a change of clothes [and several thick ones to ward off the cold], t-fal cook set and chopsticks, shoes [stripped down to 8 pairs -- still a lot!], bible and some books, toys [this was a very difficult exercise as all toys seem to be my favorite, one time or another], toiletries and meds and other comsumables, accessories [earrings, hats, bangles] and my accessory-making kit, a towel and a kumot, gadgets and KamoteQ. i think that's about it. i sure hope these stuff would weigh only 40 kilos.

oh, may i remember to love, at all times.